ode to the vitamix

Oh Vitamix. Where do I start to discuss your value, your beauty, your importance?

You are the multi-tasker of all multi-taskers. You provide me with healthy green smoothies every morning, with the promise that no matter what else I eat through the day, at least I got my nutrients early. You even allow five vegetables to virtually disappear when blended into anything I make, allowing me to sneak vitamins to the unwilling.

You even make most of the base ingredients I use in said green smoothie, like my almond milk and my nut butter. You do so without complaint, without needing a cleaning after, and without the addition of unhealthy things found in store-bought products (booooo preservatives, boooo hand washing).

Don't even get me started on how expertly you grind my coffee, both fine for a nice poor over or coarse for a good soak in the cold brew tub.

You make hot soup (or cold soup) at the press of a button!  You make frozen desserts at the press of a DIFFERENT button! You look sleek and expensive on my counter, and generally communicate my sophistication and style to all kitchen passerbys. 

So regal! So imposing!

What's more, you've recently expanded your certified reconditioned series! Although this shaves two years off the 7-year warranty, it also shaves some dollars off the price tag. Not that you aren't worth it, because you obviously are. I love how you come with a recipe book, full of wondrous pictures, and even a video of how to use your Vitamix through a 5-course dinner (watched that one with bated breath with K). You make dough, you make flour, you make salad dressings, you make my life worthwhile.

(P.S. I have the Standard Programs, $379, 5 year warranty, and you can always get free shipping. I have used it once a day since the day I bought it, and at least 3 or 4 days a week I use it more than once.)